Insecure Recap: Season 4, Episode 3, Lowkey Thankful

Insecure Recap: Season 4, Episode 3, Lowkey Thankful

Y’all. This episode was a lot. Wow. Okay.

Next week, we’ll try chronological. Maybe.

It was refreshing to see everyone amongst their families. I absolutely love Wendy Raquel as Issa’s mom and looking forward to her coming back later in the season. I refuse to believe we only get to see her once. Honestly, I loved all the cameos. I was definitely that Leonardo meme, pointing at the screen this episode. They really got into how messy families can be and it really comes down to you creating your own family and doing what’s best for you. But it also gave us a chance to understand Molly more.

Clearly, Issa and Molly’s relationship is falling apart because of poor communication. I know we’ve been getting on Molly but Issa is being super shady for no reason. But that’s really how their relationship has been from the beginning. They’ve been cute but don’t really embody what true friends should be to each other. Molly’s rude and Issa’s passive aggressive. It’s a recipe for disaster.

When Issa’s brother said, ““You ain’t gotta do something just because they say you supposed to,” she took that the wrong way. Girl, go talk to your friend. But Issa doesn’t seem to care. They agreed to talk to hash out their issues and to blow that off was selfish which is fine if she has no interest in saving the relationship. Plus, she broke tradition.  

Molly is growing. I know we want to be mad at her but she is. Her brother called her out about her mistreating her dad, she got it together. When Issa told her to stop tripping on Andrew and just say how she felt, she did it. That’s effort. It’s clear she doesn’t want to repeat her past which is what made Issa’s comment at Bristol Farms a little off kilter. Molly’s responding to criticism and adjusting. What else do we want from her?

Condola, Condola, Condola.

First of all, I’m glad that they all ran into each other at the coffee shop. Issa needed to finally accept the fact that she is not okay with being friendly with the girl her ex is dating and I wanted Condola to see that banter between Issa and Lawrence. She’s not secure or mature enough to brush it off as people who have known each other for years conversing. All she sees is a threat. Y’all saw how she bounced her lil self in their conversation? Girl.

Let’s talk about this little argument Condola and Lawrence had. I’m surprised Condy (let’s call her Condy) isn’t taking Lawrence seriously. She never gave me nonchalant vibes. I assumed she really liked him. I know this is irrelevant, but I would like to know why her husband left her. I would also like to meet her ex. What’s the tea? Honestly, as a divorced woman, I would expect her to not even want to deal with Lawrence because of his connection to Issa. It screams drama. Both of them have Issa in the forefront of their mind.

Condy finally addressed how she really feels but for some reason, she didn’t go running to the hills which is stupid. That explain why she’s downplaying the relationship to her homegirls. Of course they would still be together if Issa hadn’t cheated. Issa only did it because she was tired of him being a bum and she wasn’t being fulfilled in her relationship. Lawrence only left because he’s an insecure coward who can’t make a decision on his own. They could’ve talked about it, did a little bit of therapy and came out stronger but they weren’t mature enough for that. (Remember when Issa ran into Lawrence at that Rite Aide?) If not for Chad, he and Issa would still be together. Then, he starts whining to Chad saying if it’s not his job then it’s his relationship and basically why couldn’t everything just be perfect? Because it’s life, Lawrence. Learn to roll with the punches. And stop going to Chad for advice.

“I feel like she’s reaping all the benefits of his time with me.”

Cue the violins. Wouldn’t we hope that we leave the person we date better off than we left them? Shouldn’t we hope they get they ish together?

We can’t expect our exes to continue to be trash because that’s how they were with us. People are supposed to grow. Lawrence got his life together and that’s a good thing whether it was with Issa or not. But even if she did stay with him while he glowed up, who’s to say he would have become who she needed? And who’s to say he’s what she needs at all? You can list reason after reason why Issa deserves improved Lawrence but she deserved that years ago. She needed that when the rent was due and We Got Y’all was getting on her nerves. Issa had dreams that took a backburner to his because she had to support them. My girl could’ve been a rapper or been had her block party but she couldn’t because of him.

A very important takeaway that I don’t have the time or space to really get into: stop trying to fix these men or help them when they fall on “hard times.” Girl, let him flail in the wind and figure it out. It builds character. By all means, encourage and root from the sidelines but I don’t believe in hopping in the mix and opening my wallet or googling job openings. Like what? No ma’am. But I’m also very single so don’t listen to me.

Lawrence may look good on the outside but that’s just familiarity and comfort. It’s easy to go back to what you know. Being brave is trying again, over and over, until you meet the one who thinks you’re enough and wants to be who you need them to be, no waiting. It’s easier said than done but that doesn’t make it any less true. How much heartbreak would we save ourselves if we let go of what could’ve been and accept the fact that things simply… end? Issa is definitely holding on hence the vapid hookups and not dating seriously. The torch she’s holding and fantasizing about what could’ve been is a recipe for heartbreak. She should let Condy and Lawrence be but we know she won’t. And she’s jealous for nothing. Condy and Lawrence ain’t where it’s at. He’s sliding in her DMs and apparently Condy’s not really taking him seriously. The grass ain’t greener at all. As a matter of fact, it’s turf so the joke’s on everybody. And he don’t know if his job is secure. He’s assuming. He probably about to be a broke boy again.

I just don’t see any good coming from backsliding to Lawrence.

Do we even have time to talk about how Condy, who seemingly has her life together, is jealous of Issa? Perception is everything. Also, Condy’s friends were insufferable. Yuck. But Kelli hanging out with Trina was absolutely golden.

Where is NATHAN?!

Lastly, I miss LA so, so much.


  1. Drea
    April 27, 2020 / 5:58 am

    At first I didn’t think Issa and Lawrence wouldn’t hook up again, but after last night’s episode I definitely do think differently. Lawrence wants a wife and kids. This was evident with his conversation with his dad at the end of the last season. Condola isn’t it for him. She’s great on paper, but she seems broken. She’s literally using Lawrence to get over her ex, even though it’s been over a year since the divorce, that she’s clearly still wants.

    Issa kind of made me mad with that statement about how she got the lesser Lawrence. Well duh you will feel that way. Everybody has gone through that notion, but baby we are in our 30s so that is expected that your ex should be getting their shit together.

    • Kay
      April 27, 2020 / 6:07 am

      I forgot about that conversation with his dad. In that case, Issa ain’t it either because she is not ready for all that.

      Issa’s comment got everybody in a frenzy. Like you said, we in our 30s. And stop watching that man life. She wouldn’t be so pressed if she wasn’t all in the mix.

  2. Cassandra Noel
    April 27, 2020 / 6:15 am

    This was amazing! Loved every bit of it. It definitely makes me want to watch the episode again.

    • Kay
      April 27, 2020 / 6:45 am

      Thanks for reading!

  3. Branisha
    April 27, 2020 / 10:17 am

    I rolled my eyes the whole episode!
    At Issa for backing out of the talk with Molly!
    At the conversation between Lawrence and Chad in the car!
    At Lawrence inviting himself to Friendsgiving!
    At Condola’s friends!
    At Molly for going to Thanksgiving acting shady!
    I loved the fact that Molly and Issa said they’ve been feeling off.
    Also loved seeing everyone’s Thanksgiving IG stories!
    Kelli and Trina took the cake!
    I do think Issa and Lawrence will sleep together, but I’m not sure they’ll try the dating thing again. He’s going to lose his job and help her do the block party or something.

  4. Krystal
    April 27, 2020 / 11:15 am

    Yes where is Nate?!? I think Issa and Lawrence are going to start talking again and that’s when Nate gone pop up, you know niggas love to show face when they see you happy. But that’s going to cause Lawrence to not trust Issa again, so the relationship will be short lived. And Molly!! I been not really like Molly because of the whole Dro thing. She mad at him for being married. Girl! You knew what you was doing but anyway Issa is playing her part at being a sucky friend so this ain’t all on Molly.

  5. Ty
    April 27, 2020 / 3:35 pm

    Yes!! yes!! Yes!! To what everyone has already stated! I really don’t want the block party to be Issa’s only win this season, but it’s not looking too good for her!!

    Love this blog Kayla!!!

  6. Leslie
    April 30, 2020 / 4:29 pm

    Really great analysis! Honestly, I was shocked Condy wasn’t taking Lawrence seriously either. I thought she liked him. But after that argument they had it seemed to me that she was a little immature. I definitely think Issa and Lawrence will get back together or at least have sex lol. I have to say, I’m team Molly right now. I really think she’s trying. In all areas. Issa isn’t honest about her feelings and is sooo passive aggressive. She downplays a lot. Molly seems to be growing and unfortunately Issa seems to be stagnant in my opinion. I wish they would just talk.

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